hello =)

for an ugly person my standards are unrealistically high

fffcuk:

today this girl asked me if we were hiring and we are but i told her we weren’t because right now im the prettiest girl that works here and if she got hired i wouldn’t be anymore

virginized:

being ugly is a serious problem so don’t even joke about it

dearscience:

• books
• unexpected kindness in strangers
• the rest of the world to travel
• languages to learn
• animals to take care of
• volunteer work to do
• the power of a good night’s rest
• the changing of seasons
• infinite things to learn
• billions of people to meet and possibly love
• billions of people who might love you back

annabethoswald:

Everybody is worried about Sally, but i just want to point something

Percy: His mom was kidnaped by Hades in the lightning thief
Piper: Her dad was kidnaped by Enceladus in The Lost Hero
Jason: His mother is dead
Frank: His mother is dead
Hazel: Her mother is dead
Leo: His mother is dead
Annabeth: Her father is living in San Francisco in a warm and lovely house with his wife and two kids 

Do you see were i’m going? We should worry about Frederick Chase, not Sally Blofis-Jackson

but you forgot the part where he melted celestial bronze into bullets and started shooting a bunch of monsters to save annabeth and percy..

when a lemon ripens, does it turn even more sour or does it turn sweet? 

poledancinghunters:

Just like this:

clumsyoctopus:

life rules

- you are never as awkward as you think you are
- you are never as annoying as you think you are
- you are never as boring as you think you are
- your compliments are never as creepy as you think they are 
- you are way more wanted than you give yourself credit for
- chin up, dude

beyoncebeytwice:

im grateful to anyone that still wants to be my friend after getting to know me

fluttertree42:

why do people have quiet respectful funerals when i die i want my ashes mixed with glitter and packed tightly into a coffin and then they blow up the coffin with explosives so glitter rains down on the guests while blasting “thanks for the memories” by fall out boy

bitrude:

shoutout out to all my buddies who have shitty dads or no dads at all this father’s day, you turned out just great regardless, you can’t choose your family and you don’t deserve any negativity from them,and you don’t deserve backlash or guilt-tripping for cutting them out of your life if that’s what you need/ed to do and i love you all 

hardcorinq:

I’m not the girl boys fall in love with. I don’t have a talent in anything special. I’m not outstandingly beautiful. I’m not the easiest person to talk to sometimes. I say ‘sorry’ too often. I don’t have the perfect body. I’m not smart or mysterious or fascinating. I’m just me and that never seems to be good enough.

utmostidiocy:

A baby’s laughter is one of the most beautiful sounds you will ever hear. Unless it’s 3am. And you’re home alone. And you don’t have a baby.

bootycaller:

who wants to give up on society and go live in a treehouse with me

babyeridan:

my english teacher in 9th grade used to put prompts up for daily 5 minute writing warmups and one day the prompt was just the word “hippo” and i wrote a page long story in 5 minutes about an underground russian mafia that distributed hippo feces because they discovered that it had euphoric properties similar to marijuana it was like the new opium and rich people paid big money for it but it was illegal in every country and my teacher made me read it out loud to the class

i am the most stressed out laziest person ever i don’t even know how i do it

unsavioured:

Im buysexual, you buy me food, i become sexual

paxamericana:

welcome to the friend zone. it’s a zone for friends. hang out, have fun, grab a capri sun. there’s trampolines and a ball pit. 

chickensandwich:

i need to clean my room but what’s the point we all die anyway

procrastinators are able to do 30 minutes of work in 8 hours and 8 hours of work in the 30 minutes before it’s due

agender-unicorn:

vardaesque:

cheesoisuncool:

theres no difference between exercise and black magic both of them hurt your body at first and drain you of energy but the more you dabble in it the more powerful you become

this is the most inspiring thing i have ever read

i’ll just stick to black magic thanks

mutisija:

carry-on-my-wayward-butt:

one time i saw someone skipping rocks and eating a sandwich along the beach and idk he just tossed his sandwich in the water and bit the rock and he just stiffened a bit but i saw him dying inside after realizing what had just happened

hey, look what i found

iamnofallenstar:

quoms:

dont ever invite me over to ‘watch movies with you’ if that’s not what you actually mean because i like movies a whole lot more than i like human contact and i will just watch that movie